So this last few weeks has been trying as hell for me, which is why I haven’t been on here much recently. My apologies for that my dear readers. Yet, while I’m excited that it’s a new year filled with new possibilities and endless opportunities, so far, 2013 has also posed some very frustrating challenges for me as well. I got laid off from my regular day job, my grandmother and primary childcare provider was hospitalized, my normally very calm and sweet kid seems to be having endless temper tantrums, I’m involved in a romance that I’m not sure where it’s going, I’m trying to figure out what to do next on the overall path of my life and to top it all off, I think I’m having a dry spell… as in the dreaded writer’s block… Oh no!
Stop. Look. Listen. Just breathe. And then relax.
Sometimes, when life throws us a bunch of curve balls, and especially when it all seems to happen at once, it’s time to just take a time out and reprioritize. So as I set about formulating my next three to five year life plan, I’ve reminded myself to take some very simple truths into account:
- I can always get a new job if need be, or find a way to simply work on my books full time instead.
- If necessary, I can also move my son and me to another location that has a simpler way of life than LA and has a lower cost of living to boot.
- My grandmother is out of the hospital and better now, thank God, but I think it’s time for me to find another full time childcare provider so she can actually enjoy her retirement.
- Before I lose my mind and start pulling my hair out over my son’s tantrums, I have to remember that he’s only three and a half years old. With that little life experience, I can’t expect him to never get frazzled. Hell, I am too in the midst of so much upheaval. So I need to have a reality check and a good mommy moment and empower myself to work on better identifying and assisting with his underlying needs that are ultimately resulting in these tantrums in the first place. That’s probably more productive than listening to that annoying, nagging, self-doubting voice that keeps trying to tell me that I suck as a mom…
- The answers will come to me, they always do. I just have to ask the universe for assistance and accept the help when the right opportunities for me and my son come along. Besides, part of the fun in this life is the anticipation of the surprises, those jewel moments that result only from the unknown, that help keep life interesting.
- Well, I’m writing this blog in part to help with mitigating my so-called writer’s block, so I don’t think creativity is the problem, but rather that the real issue is that I need to get some other things settled in my life first so that I can return to that place of “flow.”
Accordingly, in the course of getting myself unstuck as it were, I’ve applied for several jobs, both here in So Cal, as well as in other parts of the country that I’m considering. I’m also starting to get interviews setup. And I’ve looked into ways to get subsidies so I can write full time too. So I’m doing the research and laying the groundwork to create the next set of options that are coming to fruition and will fully manifest soon.
Additionally, I’m looking at various preschools. ‘Cause honestly, I think my kid is a bored and lonely only child that needs to be around his peers. He’s also super smart and I’m sure he could seriously benefit from more than just my neurotic writer home schooling courses. :-)
As far as writer’s block, I’ve also been working on another mini for “The Chocolate Chronicles,” so in order to make sure I finish it sometime, any time soon, I’m enlisting your help my wonderful readers. So if you’d like a sneak peak at my new e-book “Trouble,” all you have to do is volunteer to critique it, giving me your honest opinions and suggestions regarding the story line and characters. E-mail me at email@example.com with the subject “Test Reader” and I’ll send you the PDF of the currently unpublished “beta” or rough draft version of my e-book.
Well, that’s basically it for now, but I wanted to leave y’all with one last thought that I also posted on Twitter in case any of you need more help with getting unstuck too: ‘We’ve all been through some trying times, so never lose sight of the triumph that overcoming them was and still is…’